Sunday, April 3, 2011

Loss of a friend, Kirk.

While no poem has come to me yet about this loss, it has shaken me very much.
Interesting emotions have come over me since learning of Kirks passing on Friday afternoon.
It has always been interesting to me why we cry when someone else has lost their life.  It seems selfish to cry when I am still here.
Or perhaps I should be jealous that my loved one has been able to leave the trials of this life behind and go to be with their creator. 
As a Christian, I believe that when my spirit leaves this life, I will join my Lord, and stay with Him forever in the life He has made for me
with Him.
With this spirituality in my heart, I should be joyful that my dear friend, Kirk, is no longer on earth, suffering through his illness.  His body gave way and his spirit has moved on.  In my belief, he is in a better, peaceful, lovely place where he can rest and exist in a painfree heaven.
Despite this spiritual belief, I have still had trouble with tears.  Are they truly selfish, or are they tears of joy that his suffering has ended? 
With all I know of grief, this is one thing I have not come to terms with. 
No matter how many tears I cry when someone I care about passes, I have less and less fear of dying myself.  The older I get and the more of life I experience (wanted to say endure) the thought of my own death is not frightening.  Part of this is my faith and part is my desire to be in a better situation.  (No I am not suicidal)
So, as I process and come to terms with the fact that I will not see my dear friend on this earth again, I will continue to have tears, enjoy the flood of memories that come and miss him deeply.  Once his body has been laid to rest, I know that my heart will be more at ease, but the loss will be felt each day, as with all the other loved ones that have gone before him. 
So, I pray gently to my God that He is holding Kirk closely and guiding him to the rest he so deserves.
There will never be another to come close to the friend that I found in Kirk.
For those reading this, always remember the loved ones that have left this earth.  Keep their memories close in whatever way you will.  The pain of loss is less when we keep the light of our loved ones shining in our hearts.
God bless you my friends.

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